Creative expressions

Three weeks’ ago, when I was preparing for my second marathon, I wondered what I wanted to listen to during my run. I was deciding between my favourite songs and recorded talks by certain psychotherapists. Just to make sure I was well-prepared, I compiled both – a playlist of songs as well as a series of talks.

As I was eagerly waiting amidst the crowd of runners on that fateful morning just before 5 am, I decided to start my marathon by listening to a presentation by Jon Carlson and Pat Love. The presentation consisted of a two-part workshop with a total length of 2 hours 45 min. This means that I would have completed about 24 km by the end of the presentation. Interestingly, the title of the presentation was “The loneliness epidemic”. I am fearful of loneliness so I thought it would be enlightening to hear more from the experts on this topic.

Jon and Pat talked about what one should attend to in one’s life in order to alleviate one’s loneliness. In one of the points, they urged listeners to consider the question, “Are my talents being utilised in meaningful work?”

Pat elaborated, “Am I using what I was born with, a particular skill-set? Am I using that in a way that touches the lives of at least one other person, not just benefiting me.”

While I was running, I asked myself what my talents are and whether they are utilised in meaningful work. The idea is framed in a very interesting way because it does not necessarily imply that you have to find a meaningful job or career that makes use of your talent. It is pondering about your talent and what you do with it, such that it is not just kept to yourself, but is used in a way that positively influences another person.

For talents, I immediately thought of singing and for meaningful work, I thought of my work as a counsellor. How is my talent in singing used in meaningful work and how is my work as a psychotherapist making use of my talents? Singing therapy? Ha! I never thought of that, which is certainly an interesting possibility, but let us not complicate the topic of the discussion because we can make use of our different talents to do different things.

“The art of music is divine and effective. It is the food of the soul and spirit. Through the power and charm of music the spirit of man is uplifted.” – ‘Abdu’l-Bahá

Singing feels like that for me – the food of my soul and spirit. Although I sometimes have to learn some very difficult music scores during choir practices, I enjoy singing and listening to the blending of the voices of my fellow choristers. One of the most fascinating thing about singing is how a human being can use his or her voice to produce music – the sound which is produced comes from the entire body, which acts as the instrument. The emotional and psychological state of the singer influences and affects the quality, tone and feeling of the song. There is no one way of singing and there is room for creativity, the use of self and self-expression.

Singing together creates that special bond among my choir friends. When we perform, our songs bridge that gap with the audience and strangers connect with us through our music. We strive for technical excellence but more importantly, we want to be able to move and touch our listeners and evoke the feelings and emotions in them. Perhaps this is how I will be able to utilise singing in meaningful work.

Talents are usually associated with creative expressions of art but there is a wide range of talents that you can consider. Remember that if you do not have a particular talent, nothing is stopping you from learning, studying and mastering it. If you already have a talent, you can grow and develop it and use your creativity and inspiration so that it translates to meaningful work. I have listed a range of possibilities below and they are by no means exhaustive.

Talents (possibilities!): sketching, drawing, painting, sculpting, sewing, knitting, crochet, origami, scrapbooking, digital art, interior design, architectural design, singing, playing musical instruments, composing music, poetry, story-telling, writing, drama, floral arrangement, baking, cooking

In the presentation, Pat suggested that the talent or activity should meet five criteria. First, you should have a sense of anticipation such that you look forward to engaging in that activity. Second, it should be something, which challenges you because that is how you are able to stretch yourself and develop your potential to the fullest. Third, you should find it absorbing – you will feel that way if you are enjoying the activity! Fourth, your talent has to be energising – you may be physically tired while you are at it but it should not drain you emotionally or psychologically. Lastly, you should feel a sense of congruence that this is exactly what you like to be doing!

Let me share two vignettes – the first is about Dongsu. Dongsu is a young professional who works as a financial analyst. He was becoming less motivated about his job and found it more and more dreary as time went by. He was proficient at crunching numbers and analysing data and trends. However, these did not excite him. His passion was playing the violin. He wanted to become a professional violinist to perform as well as to teach others. Hence, he contemplated quitting his job and taking time to study music. Unfortunately, he started to doubt his talent because he could not feel the music as he played. He practised for many hours and studied very hard but he felt that he had some mental block, which he could not get past.

When Dongsu spoke to me, I sensed his anxiety and the tension within himself. He was also feeling increasingly depressed and losing his self-confidence. How we feel affects our performance in our work and our talents. I suggested to Dongsu that before he plays his instrument, he needs to take time to wind down, to put aside his distress, fears and worries. After that, he can take his violin and play it, not as a financial analyst, but as himself, the violinist. When Dongsu met me again, he excitedly shared that he tried it and the feeling came back – he felt the music resonate between the violin and him again. I was very happy for Dongsu that he re-connected with his talent. I also reminded him that there are good days and there are bad days. If he is truly in-tune with the rhythm of his instrument, he will be able to sense his emotional experiences through the music of the violin because the music and him are really one.

The second vignette is about my mother, who is in her mid-fifties. She is an amazing lady with numerous talents but she neither boosts nor brags about them. Among the talents she is endowed with, is her gift of handicraft, including crochet, cross-stitch and knitting. I remember throughout my growing up years, my mother made various items as gifts for the family, relatives and friends, for charity bazaars and even for sale. Many people are most impressed by my mother’s cross-stitch portraits. You may think that cross-stitch does not require much skill because each cross-stitch is really simple to sew – it is a combination of two stitches to make an ‘x’. However, it takes an incredible amount of determination, discipline, persistence and tenacity to complete an entire cross-stitch portrait.

The picture you see here is a cross-stitch family portrait, which my mother did many years’ ago.

Recently, my mother started volunteering with a friend at a halfway house and a girls’ home where she utilised her talent of handicraft in meaningful work. At the halfway house, she taught the ladies crochet, knitting and cross-stitch so that they can make items for sale. At the girls’ home, my mother taught the girls some handicraft as part of their holiday activities. These were simple acts and gestures of kindness but I am sure that they will go a long way to touch the lives of these women. One of the girls who remembers my mother fondly, shared that, “She was awesome!” Yes, my mother is awesome.

“The source of crafts, sciences and arts is the power of reflection. Make ye every effort that out of this ideal mine there may gleam forth such pearls of wisdom and utterance as will promote the well-being and harmony of all the kindreds of the earth.” - Bahá'u'lláh

The house of the soul

Each of us has our own associations with the word “soul”. Whether you have a religious belief or not, the soul can be thought of as the essence of who you are as a human being. The soul is a part of you which is neither physical nor matter, consisting of the mind, thoughts, emotions, personality and whatever you consider the spirit of the self. To me, the house of the soul is in fact the body. Our body is the custodian of our soul because the effects of the body, whether good or bad, will affect the soul. Of course, the effects of the soul are also felt by the body because there is a connection between the body and the soul.

From my belief of the Bahá'í Faith, the Báb said, “As this physical frame is the throne of the inner temple, whatever occurs to the former is felt by the latter.” Buddha referred to this idea as well that, “To keep the body in good health is a duty... otherwise we shall not be able to keep our mind strong and clear.”

In the paragraphs that follow, I would like to focus on how we can take care of the house of the soul through physical activity. The expressions of the soul are projected to the outside world in our interactions with people around us. The attributes of the soul are also reflected in the work that we produce and create in our everyday life.

For most people, to engage in a physical activity is to exercise or play a sport. I believe that the Health Promotion Board (HPB) has attempted to educate the population in various ways through talks, brochures, advertisements about the importance of exercise and the effects of having a healthy body and lifestyle. Most of us probably have an intellectual and factual understanding of these ideas and yet they are so difficult to implement in our busy city lifestyles. In fact, I wonder how many of the people in HPB actually walk the talk. It is much easier to tell someone what to do than to actually carry it out yourself. Whenever I make any suggestions or recommendations about what my clients can do to make changes and adjustments in their lives, I ask myself if I have been able to do them myself and ponder on my own experience of having done so. As much as we desire idealism, life has its practical dimension and we have to be realistic about our expectations about what can or cannot be done.

So, how do we strike a balance so that we allow ourselves to experience life in a variety of ways? I call it “self-care”. Otherwise, we will be running our life on an empty tank. Rather than viewing physical activity as a necessity for maintaining your fitness or some sort of a chore and burden, it is really taking care of your body and a form of respite from the stressors of your life.

There is never enough time for anything else besides our work, school or running the household. It is true that time is an important parameter in this equation because all of us have the same finite amount of time – 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. It can also be argued that our experience of the length of time is not the same. Typically, when we are doing something that we enjoy or spending time with people whom we love, time seems to fly by so quickly. However, when we are feeling down or when we are doing something we are not particularly excited about, time seems to take forever to pass.

Hence, whatever physical activity we choose to do, it has to fit into the rhythm of our life. We have to select something, which our body is capable of doing, nothing too strenuous and vigorous if your limbs and your heart are unable to endure. It is beyond maintaining fitness – you have to feel good about it. Actually, there is a range of possibilities that you can consider: walking, jogging, running, swimming, cycling, sports, golf, dancing and so on. Even when you select a particular activity, there are so many ways of customising that activity so that it suits your personality, lifestyle, life-stage, and has features and characteristics of who you are.

Esther has been actively involved in sports since she was a little girl. She shared that although she is a very good swimmer, she prefers to run. She feels that swimming is too restrictive since she often swims in the swimming pool, and swimming laps across the pool is not very interesting or exciting for her. Instead, she enjoys running in a park where she can soak in the atmosphere, breathe in the fresh air and find delight in the lush greenery of the surroundings. Running gives Esther a sense of freedom and a feeling of liberation. Esther found for herself an avenue which gives her strength to get through the challenges of her life.

For the longest time, I was very much accustomed to the sedentary lifestyle of engaging in indoor activities such as reading, going to the movies and shopping in the malls. Occasionally, I went swimming just to make sure I maintained some level of fitness and lose the calories from my indulgence in chocolates and cakes.

When I first started running about a year and a half ago, I ran not because I enjoyed running. I did not enjoy running then. I ran because my friend encouraged me to do so. During the prime of my youth, running never struck me as an activity of choice. Never. I ran for the sake of running.

After about half a year of running regularly, somehow, I found a kind of rhythm, which resonated with my being. That was when running made sense to me and had a meaning for me. I found my favourite running routes, which alternated between running on the skybridge of the place where I live, and running around the city area, which is near the vicinity of my home. While running on the skybridge, I enjoy the night sky, which is often lit by the bright moon and dotted with numerous stars when there is little cloud cover. I get to admire the beautiful view of the city skyline as well as the vastness of the city landscape from the elevated position on the skybridge. As for the city route, I usually run along the Singapore river where high-rise office buildings and other fancy architectures populate the surroundings. During my runs, I listen to my iPod nano, which plays my favourite songs and audio recordings of talks by various psychotherapists and other inspirational speakers. When I am on my feet, I connect with myself, the whole of my being – body, mind and soul. I feel rejuvenated and refreshed. I become inspired.

Take a moment to think about what you can do for yourself. It can be as simple as taking a walk in the park, strolling at your own pace and connecting with parts of yourself that you did not have time to pay attention to. If you have a pet dog, walking the dog can be fun and enjoyable as well. For those with infants, this is a perfect opportunity to put your baby in the stroller and take a walk around your housing estate.

All of us are unique individuals and what works for me may not work for you. What is important is to take the first step, to start exploring what works for you, and create a sense of rhythm for yourself to allow the energy to flow within your body, the house of your soul

Whatever you choose to do, be mindful of your experience. Be present with yourself. Be there for you.